Happiness damn near destroys you...

The Fray has a song I absolutely love called Happiness.

One of the verses is something I've had quite a lot of experience with:
Happiness damn near destroys you
Breaks your faith to pieces on the floor
So you tell yourself, that's probably enough for now
Happiness has a violent roar

I think we all feel like that sometimes, don't we? Often it is because we're so happy, we could burst, or we're so happy, we just know something is going to come along and mess it up. As Charles Schultz said, through the mouth of Charlie Brown, "I think I'm afraid to be happy, because whenever I get too happy, something bad always happens."

The last several months, I haven't been happy. I was happy. I was thrilled with how my life was going. I finally had a grip on things. And then, suddenly, life threw me a curveball, and things got messed up, and I went to the dark place. And right now, I'm finally starting to pull myself out (with a lot of help from a lot of people).

Am I going to stop letting myself be happy? No. Am I going to be afraid to feel joy, because I'm sure sorrow will follow? No. After all, without pain, pleasure wouldn't be half as sweet. Without tears, smiles wouldn't be so beautiful. The things that don't kill us make us stronger. As a favorite Hemingway quote says, "The world breaks everyone and afterward, many are stronger at the broken places."

I'm a survivor. I can get through anything, be it a failed relationship, a disappointing grade, a moment of weakness, a complete mistake of my own making, or anything else the world throws at me. And I will feel pain, and I will be broken again. But I am confident in knowing that I'll also be myself again...and that one day, when I least expect it, without knowing how or why or from where it came, happiness will find its way back to me, and it will feel all the better for having made it through the rain.
Happiness is like the old man told me
Look for it, but you'll never find it all
But let it go, live your life and leave it
Then one day, wake up and she'll be home

Go visit Jen and check out other spins this week!


Sprite's Keeper said...

Ack! I'm so sorry! I have been out of town all weekend and just logged on. I've always tried to find happiness in the little things even when life is hitting me curve ball after curve ball. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I know you'll find your way. If only because you're a survivor, you WILL find your way. And there is happiness in that alone.
You're linked!

Captain Dumbass said...

Life does tend to throw curve balls at you like that when everything seems to be going great, but that's just the way it is. Enjoy the happiness, store it up when there's extra.

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