RTT: Things to look forward to...

*Almost two weeks ago, I became Auntie Andrea. No, this is not a child of my older sister, saradoxical, for those of you who know her and would be wondering why she hasn't mentioned it. There's more on this soon - for now, I give you this lovely picture of me and my new nephew:

*My beautiful Mommie Dearest (yes, that is exactly what my sister and I called her until we learned better..) gave me an award. That'll be up soon.

*The entertaining and fabulous Jess also bestowed an award on my unworthy ass. A couple weeks ago, actually. I've been busy. You'll see that in the next few days.

*More posts from the 30-Day writing challenge.

*The semester is coming to an end. Only a couple more weeks. No spring and summer classes this year, so hopefully y'all will be hearing more from me.

*It's been a rough month or two, but things can only get better...right?

Day 3: You just get pictures today

I don't feel good and I don't have much to say. Other than don't judge me for the third one. We all need some eye-candy and mindless entertainment now and then :-)

Day 2: Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken

When I was a kid, without a doubt, my favorite movie was Wild Hearts Can't be Broken.

It was a live-action Disney movie, about a girl, Sonora Webster (played by Gabrielle Anwar who has called Wild Hearts the favorite of her films), who is a runaway during the 1930s. She gets a job as a stable hand for Doc Carver, and his 'diving horses.' She dreams of becoming a diving girl, and eventually gets her break. There is an accident, and it looks like she may never dive again. But hard work and courage pay off, and naturally it ends well. It is Disney, after all.

Throughout the story, Sonora develops a relationship with Doc's son, Al, played by Michael Schoeffling, better known to most children of the 80s as Jake Ryan. This was the first movie I had seen him in (I was 9 - Sixteen Candles was still several years away) and I immediately fell in love. He is the perfect leading man - charming, sensitive, gorgeous, strong, secure. He was probably my first real celebrity crush, and I am still sad that he dropped out of the industry. I would give an arm to see how he looks today - he turns 50 this year and I would bet that he looks amazing still. Sigh. Old crushes die hard.

I think the reason I love this movie so much, still, is that I see a little bit of myself in Sonora. She's a little bit wild, a lot bit stubborn, and she doesn't give up. I like to think that I have those same characteristics. It's an inspiring story without being completely hokey, and there is happiness but also sorrow. This movie, to me, has stood up to time and its classic themes keep me hooked year after year. Recently I discovered Netflix has it on instant movies, so you can bet I'll be watching it incredibly soon.

"I found my destiny, not in far off places but within myself."

Day 1: Who has just ONE favorite song?

For me, music needs to touch me. It needs to make me feel something, good or bad. It needs to hit that spot in my soul that simple words just can't, and connect with me on a level that I don't always get from life in general.

Today, I bring you two of my favorite songs.

The first is Falling Slowly from Once, which is an amazing movie and you all should see.

I find it incredibly beautiful. It's sad and hopeful and uplifting all at once. Sometimes it gets me teary-eyed, sometimes not...but I every time I hear it, I feel my heart fill up.



The second is Just Watch the Fireworks by Jimmy Eat World.

I love the lyric: "Here you can be anything, and I think that scares you" because it is so completely true. That point? Where you are at the edge of getting or being everything you want? It's terrifying. And the point where you can be yourself with someone? When you feel like you can drop all the layers and masks and just be you? Also terrifying.


(Ignore whatever show that is...Smallville? I just wanted a non-live version of the song)

I have a million more songs that I love, and are my "favorites" but they change so frequently it's hard to list them all. What can I say? Years of working in music stores, and many years before that of babysitting at my aunt and uncle's house and making mix tapes from their million CDs, and I am an avid music lover.

Tomorrow - favorite movie. Then and Now!

30-Day Challenge? (Or, beating last year's amount of posts by the middle of April)

I stole this from my lovely and immensely talented big sister, saradoxical.

I'm a couple days late starting, but I will catch up with three in one in a little bit, after I go for a brisk walk/slow run :-)

Look forward to me actually posting this month!
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In an effort to write more in here, I am borrowing this 30 day challenge from various friends on LiveJournal. Starting tomorrow, I shall be blogging on these topics:

Day 01 — Your favorite song
Day 02 — Your favorite movie
Day 03 — Your favorite television program
Day 04 — Your favorite book
Day 05 — Your favorite quote
Day 06 — Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 07 — A photo that makes you happy
Day 08 — A photo that makes you angry/sad
Day 09 — A photo you took
Day 10 — A photo of you taken over ten years ago
Day 11 — A photo of you taken recently
Day 12 — Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 13 — A fictional book
Day 14 — A non-fictional book
Day 15 — A fanfic
Day 16 — A song that makes you cry (or nearly)
Day 17 — An art piece (painting, drawing, sculpture, etc.)
Day 18 — Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 19 — A talent of yours
Day 20 — A hobby of yours
Day 21 — A recipe
Day 22 — A website
Day 23 — A YouTube video
Day 24 — Whatever tickles your fancy
Day 25 — Your day, in great detail
Day 26 — Your week, in great detail
Day 27 — This month, in great detail
Day 28 — This year, in great detail
Day 29 — Hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days
Day 30 — Whatever tickles your fancy

I'll give you the best of me, but you won't see the rest of me....

So, what better way to end a blogging dry spell than by jumping into the Spin Cycle? This week, Jen over at Sprite's Keeper asked us to pick out our favorite blog, and repost that.

Well, I don't have just one. So I'm rebelling. And these aren't necessarily my favorites, but ones that have some kind of meaning to me, or tell you the most about who I am. And I'm just posting a link, and a couple lines about why you should read it. I've picked up a few new readers recently (until I disappeared for weeks, probably) so this is as good an intro to the crazy but wonderful but terrible but entertaining world of Andrea.

Here goes....

"No, those are NOT my Magnum condoms...."
One of my most popular posts - it's how several people found me, after it was featured on Good Mom/Bad Mom. Reading back over it now, I still crack up. And turn red. This story has made the rounds, including at my work. Some things can really only happen to me....

So yes, been there. Done that. Laughed about it afterwards. Sometimes for years, because some of those stories just won't die....

But until tonight, I have never know true mortification.

"Crawling in the Dark"
My struggles, living with a chronic, painful illness. It's a side of me that I try not to show all that often - who wants people knowing they have weaknesses? But to know me is to know this, so here it is.

In the three years since then, I have been to the doctor more times than I care to count. I have had more blood drawn than seems humanly possible, and spent far too much money on medication and Icy-Hot. Not quite what I imagined my life would be like at 26.
I have been lucky.

"my first spin cycle"
This is getting posted only cause it's the first, and I just saw it. The topic was 'poetry' and I was apparently feeling quite angsty. In haiku form.

bitter.
three small words break me
again, pieces in your hands.
yea, well, fuck you too
(how can i still miss you?)

"and this is why i will never settle for anything less than everything"
My parents were celebrating their 30th anniversary. Of their engagement. It reminded me how lucky I was to have them, and their example. I can't say enough good things about my parents. I love them in ridiculous amounts.

Yes, my parents are that couple....The couple that if you are a stranger walking behind them at the grocery store, you will undoubtedly notice the way that when they are walking side-by-side, their hands just automatically find each other.

"The best I can give you is the worst part of me"
This was actually what I posted for my 'worst' blog as a spin cycle last summer. And part of why I had chosen it was because I was letting my guard down - which is exactly why I'm posting it now.

I AM genuinely happy for all the people I care about, but it just reminds me of my failures. And my failures? Not something I want the world to see. In this post, it's just me, being honest, and putting my heart out there for everyone to explore. And losing my usual cover of strength and independence? Scary.

"I barely have the breath to breathe"
Another honest post. It's odd that I will say anything here, but in real life? I hide it all.

Have you ever woken up one morning and wondered where the hell you were?

I’m not talking about that sinking feeling in your stomach you get after a one-night stand,
where you literally have no idea where you are, although that is part of this--I’m talking
about that sinking feeling in your soul when you suddenly realize you have no idea how your life got to this point.

"A letter to me, age 17"
Another Spin Cycle post - this was a free spin and I got it into my head that I should write a letter to myself, ten years ago. It's a favorite because I honestly wish I could go back in time and share this with her.

You aren't getting married in the next ten years anyway, and looking back, you'll realize that you should've just slept with him and at least had your first time mean something, instead of waking up after a night of heavy drinking on an air mattress after losing it to some guy you just met. (FYI - This might still happen. In that case, there IS a house alarm, and sneaking off at 6.30am? Won't work.)

"Hell yea, I have someone I love this Valentine's Day"
Yet another Spin Cycle. Jen makes me write better, apparently :-) I love this one, because it reminds me of how far I've come.

This year though? I'm forgetting about the past. This year, I am dedicating the day to myself, and reminding myself why I love who I am. I am celebrating me, and I'm gonna buy myself some flowers, and I am going to remember that I do just fine on my own, thank you very much...

One day I'll figure out what I want to be when I grow up....

When I was a kid, I would reach for the stars. My potential career list included rockstar, teacher, garbagewoman, astronaut, archaeologist, gymnast, doctor, artist, and lord knows what else. By the time I hit puberty, I had started to narrow the focus a little more to things slightly more realistic - writer, journalist, teacher, or similar. When I started college, I knew I was going to be a writer. Whether it was a Pulitzer-winning journalist, or a New York Times best-selling novelist, I was going to make a name for myself.

Now? I may as well be six-years-old again, drawing pictures of myself, waving out the window of a spaceship.

When I started college again last winter, I was set on a business degree. After living through ups and downs for years, stability and practicality sounded good. I reasoned that even if I didn't have a lot of interest in a lot of the classes, I could fake my way through, and still do well enough to insure a graduation with honors.

Recently, I've been rethinking that decision. I've been thinking back to the classes I've taken that I liked - LOVED - and excelled in. I've been wondering if I'd ever get as excited about accounting or salesmanship as I did about speech and interpersonal communications. I've been realizing that I am not nearly analytical enough to get through another two years of business courses. And I've been reading the course descriptions for my upcoming curriculum, and already starting to dread next Fall.

And then it hit me - Why would I do this to myself? Why should I suffer through painfully boring prerequisites only to get to a program that is "practical"? A program that, as much as I've tried to psyche myself up for, I am dreading. I'm looking ahead a year and a half, and I can see myself just struggling to pass classes, trying to keep interest long enough to make sure I get a C. I can actually see myself being happy with mediocrity, and that? Is not something I'm willing to settle for.

A few months ago I started tossing around the idea of changing my major. Of getting out of the College of Business. Of never taking another economics class, or discussing legalities of contracts, or worrying about how in the hell I'm going to manage to pass finance and accounting classes. And I started looking at other options.

Yesterday, I made a [not-yet-set-in-stone] decision: I am going to change my major. I am going to get back to what I love - what I'm good at - and focus on Communications. And right now, I'm leaning towards a minor in Psychology.

The good news? This won't add any more years to my schooling. I already have a few of the prereqs covered for both of those programs. And looking through the class lists, and what I would have to take? I'm interested. I WANT to take Listening Behavior, and Intercultural Communication, and yes, okay, The Psychology of Sex. There isn't a single thing on the course lists that makes me shudder, or makes me question what I've gotten myself into - definitely unlike the requirements for that Marketing degree, which made my eyes glaze over just by reading the titles...

So, I have a plan. I'm starting to make the pieces fall into place. I've emailed the advising office, to make sure I didn't miss something completely obvious, and that my theory that I'll be able to do this in the same amount of time isn't way off-base. And I emailed the HR manager at work, to see if this degree will be any better or worse than a business degree. From conversations before I started school, it'll be fine, but I want to make sure before I commit to anything.

Right now I'm in hold, but I can't wait to figure out if this is the way to go. I'm moving forward, and at the moment, that's really all that matters.

RTT: Spring is coming and I'm invincible.

*Spring is in the air. It's slightly less cold when I wake up at 4.30am to go to the gym. It's making it slightly more bearable to leave my warm, cozy bed. And by the time I drive to work? I can hear birds singing. And the sun is shining. Love.

*Spring is my co-favorite season with autumn. Spring because of new beginnings. A clean slate. Everything is new and fresh. I always believed that if I ever fell in love, it would happen in the springtime. Not counting on it this year, but we'll see how next year goes.

*For the last week and a half I have been unstoppable. Nothing's getting me down. Sure, I have things I'm stressed about, as always, but for the first time in a really, really, REALLY long time, I don't feel like I'm drowning. And it feels damn good.

*What also feels good? Being 7 pounds down after my first week back on Weight Watchers. You can track my progress (and read what I think are funny stories) at my other blog, Loving Me Naked.

*I'm wearing a bright pink Snuggie right now. I only had on light PJ pants and a tank top, and I got chilly. Don't judge me.

*I have been re-reading some favorite books lately. Three of them are by Liza Palmer, one of my favorite authors. Every book she writes speaks to a different part of me, and reading all three, back to back? I feel drained and hopeful and exhausted and sad and joyful and inspired all at once. It's amazing. Eventually I'll be posting reviews of them, because they're that fantastic. Her second novel is called 'Seeing Me Naked' and was the inspiration for my new blog title.

*The other book I just finished re-reading was The Next Thing on My List by Jill Smolinski. Again, it got me thinking. If I had a list of 20 things to do by the time I was 30, what would they be? Finish school, for one. Hit my goal weight. Skydive. Hit my goal weight. Other than that, though? I have no idea. I always saw the big things for me happening after that age, if they happen at all - getting married, having kids....And those aren't things that I'm tied to. I guess I really don't have 'goals', just things that I would do if the opportunity arose. I wonder what that says about me...

*Meijer's Churned-Style Light Chocolate Moose Tracks ice cream? Freaking amazing. Totally worth 3 points a serving. Way more satisfying than just fat-free chocolate or something. Yum!

*Yes, I realize that I just went from what could turn into an insightful revelation into my inner workings, to raving about ice cream. It's just easier.

Softball + Lack of coordination = Bad idea. (Spin Cycle!)

Growing up, I was always athletic. Gymnastics, soccer, basketball, bike-riding and rollerblading for miles around the neighborhood...I loved it all. I was insanely flexible, in great shape, and had a good sense of balance (that unfortunately disappeared around the time I went from an A to a C).

That's me, in the center, back in my gymnastics days. I *think* I'm about 10 or11 here, but I could be way off.

 These days? Well, the flexibility died a long time ago (hence why I bought the DVD 'Yoga for Inflexible People'). Strength? To put it nicely, I'd be able to beat a kitten in a fist fight, but not many other things. And balance? Does righting myself fast enough to not fall over when I run into walls count?

I'm a klutz. I've accepted it. I also, up until very recently (see my new blog!), am incredibly lazy. So three years ago, when I started at my current job and heard about the softball team, I surprised myself by signing up. I think part of it was knowing that it'd be a way to get to know coworkers - I had just started, and I was coming off a job where I knew and liked almost everyone. I had played a couple intramurel games before, but that had been years before, and I was fairly sure I was going to be terrible.

So before the season started, I went to a practice with a friend's different team.
It didn't go well.

 

Do you love how I'm smiling? Yes, I am magical, thank you.

Anyway, the first year went as I figured. I sucked. I was terrible. By the end of the season, I was finally able to throw the ball from home base (I always played catcher, since it was the least important position) to the pitcher. Once in a while I hit the ball. I think I even scored a couple times. 

Season 2? I got promoted. Second base became my home, and while I wasn't good, I was improving. I started going to the batting cages, and making more of an effort to not....suck. When the season ended, I was fairly consistently getting hits, and occasionally making a decent play in the infield.

And this past summer...best yet. More of the same, just improving more and more. Sure, I have my off moments, and stupid plays, and mistakes, but whatever. It's a company team, it's fun, and that's all I really care about. We were regular season champions! Go Mud Dawgs!!

And I can't wait for the season to start this year :-)

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For more sports-themed spins, pay a visit to Jen the Incredible @ Sprite's Keeper!

Another little corner of the internet, just for me

So I don't bore my faithful readers (all 4 of you?) I have decided to make a separate blog to post my progress on my new weight-loss/get fit/get healthy/kick ass/etc mission.

You can find me at Loving Me Naked if you are so inclined.
(Yes, I realize that I will likely get some interesting visitors...)

That's all! More real, fun stories soon! This week is slightly less crazy than the last....52 or so.